'Tromp-Tromp-Tromp' - the Guard have arrived! Admire their disciplined musket volleys, and real in the face of their devastating bayonet-drill. Just don't get in their way! Instinct: to loyally defend the Empire

• Disciplined musket-fire
• Masterful bayonet-charge

Look at this poor, awkward bastard, dressed in the livery of the Empire. Chances are, he's barely been trained to use that brand-new musket he's got. Standard Imperial tactics involve firing a shot, and then scuttling-in to have a go at you with his bayonet. Poor bugger. Instinct: To (reluctantly) serve the Empire

• Shaky musket-fire
• Blow emergency whistle
• Bayonet-charge

The piece de resistance of the park - an enormous, steam-powered dragon, complete with red 'weak points' for excitable children to whack with wooden swords. Now animated by malevolent magic, and exhaling super-heated water vapour that can boil real soldiers inside their armour. Somebody's given it real wings, too. That can't be... human leather they're made from, right? Sometimes, when it moves, strange, otherworldly voices can be heard whispering, from within it - a testament, no doubt, to its true masters. Instinct: to burn and melt

• Exhale superheated steam
• Flap its enormous, creepy wings
• Whisper dark things

'Clatter-Hiss', go the little Steam Minions, as they hurry about the park. What a delight! But wait - why are their boilers glowing red-hot? Why are their cartoonish painted faces bubbling off? Why are they suddenly swarming this way? Instinct: to patrol

• Sword strike
• Sudden venting
• Tactical retreat